Now I realize why I felt so uncomfortable being with S.H. Aside from the fact that I felt I was being "used" and manipulated by her. I saw her as someone so weak, fragile, and pathetic to even be reprimanded. Which was why at the end of the day, after being with her, I felt so cross, pathetic, unhappy and sorry for myself too. Plus, I didn't have any reason to hang out with her in the first place. Everything I did was out of being polite, civil and because I thought I was doing her a favor. I hated that feeling. Which is why my insides felt like screaming out every time I was with her and I always tried to avoid her when I could. It's different when you really agree with someone wholeheartedly and like them regardless. And it's really torturous to not like someone at all and yet be subjected to their unwanted company NO MATTER HOW NICE THEY SEEM TO BE. Because it just really wouldn't work out! She can't blame me for letting go.
- Sorry that's just the harsh truth of it... sayonara